Release the Fear of Judgement
One of my favourite books that I read a few years ago was a book called “Feel the Fear and do It anyway” (by Susan Jeffers)
What I learnt was that fear is one of the most crippling hurdles many women face in their personal and career lives. It is when they are passionate and most vulnerable to growing and expanding their reach. Fear of judgement from other people often outweighs many other concerns, especially when greater levels of visibility are required on social media. These days profiles like Facebook, LinkedIn and Instagram are just a few of the superficially demanding sites of standing out online. Being faced with this exposure and speaking with other women, there is sometimes a sense of darkness that is not spoken about. Behind these scenes, there is experiences of unhappiness, depression, anxiety and low self esteem that come from being exposed online. It can be so detrimental to your own self worth in feeling the constant battle of being perfect or constantly feeling not good enough. Working with women for most of my life, I often hear these regular complaints.
My strong beliefs in women’s empowerment, positive body activation and speaking your truth, is made up of three values; a simple mind-set, a sincere heart-shift and releasing the fear of judgement so that you as a woman can thrive unapologetically.
The Three Values are:
1. A regular daily meditation practice
Whether you choose to sit upright in a lotus position or be on your back to take time out in your day to practice mindfulness, it is your re-set and pause button. This is you’re the precious time that you have to help you move us of judgement and into awareness. When you are fully present with your breath and out of your head, you no longer the judge, you are now witnessing the judge in your mind. By witnessing awareness and being fully present you are released from judgement, you are free to live and be. You will find yourself no longer judging others in unkind ways and most importantly, you stop judging yourself and being so obsessed with the rational mind. Your heart comes into play as the Queen here and the mind steps down to the role of servant. This place of sovereignty is uncommon and a precious state of being for a woman. It is where you allow yourself to reach a state of gracefulness and unlimited ease and abundance. It is magnetic and regal. It is vital to practice.
2. Mind your own business
Have you ever noticed that during times of busy-ness and focus, you simply do not have the time or space to be concerned with anyone else’s business? Gossip and judgement are often by-products of boredom and lack of direction. When you’re focussing on your own soul-realisation by serving the needs and desires of others, and staying true to the intentions and values of your own goals, you simply don’t have the bandwidth to be overly concerned with what other people are doing or saying. Practice being accountable to yourself and setting your own personal goals independently of external advice. A good coach or mentor will support you to be independent in your decision-making and trusting your inner guidance system so that you can flourish once the coaching program is complete. Mind your own business and you’ll find that it will appreciate.
3. Stop being a consumer/critic and become creative/ and contribute
I am often faced with two distinct states of being. How often I’m in the reacting space, critical and assessing, responding as a consumer or critic. And how often I give myself time to be in a creative and flow state of mind. How often I am being a creator who is energised, nourished and revitalised by the messy but good feel creative process? Or am I contributing to the world by choice or am I holding back by playing the critic instead? When I am in the creative mindset I lose self-consciousness and judgement. It is very important in the line of work that I do, to make the time to be creative and contribute instead of slipping into the default mode of consumerism. This is a practice that requires a commitment of being self-aware, being sublet and not being brain washed by our toxic media. For me yoga for everyBODY was created out of sincere passion for wanting to assist women of all ages and all stages of their life including my own. There is so much consuming images, mindless content and material goods that we are constantly being bombarded with. An antidote to consumerism is to gently create something that makes it worthwhile to contribute and it tells a story without judgement or pain.